This one’s for you, Satan.
I.am.done.
I’m done putting up with your attacks. I’m done putting up with your lies. I’m done with you attacking my family. I’m done with you picking on the vulnerable, the least of these, the ones who can’t fight for themselves.
Enough.is.Enough! This is my battle cry.
It started a few months ago… my sweet 4 year old son, Declan came up the stairs one morning and told us that he had fallen out of bed in the middle of the night. He said that he was crying and that there was a man in his room who was laughing at him and calling him a “big baby”.
Chills ran down my spine. After comforting him, I rationalized with myself that he must have just been dreaming. However, the bruise on his leg told otherwise.
A few months later, my husband Nate was downstairs telling Declan a bedtime story. After telling the story of a little boy, Declan wanted the story told again, but this time with a little girl. Nate agreed and asked Declan what her name should be. “Lucifer” was his answer. Nate asked him why he chose that name and he replied with, “I just like that name.”
Chills again. Then scared. Then angry.
I contacted Declan’s Sunday school teachers HOPING that they had brought up that name in class the day before when talking about Adam and Eve and the serpent. I just wanted, needed him to have heard it from someone, somewhere. Nothing. Nothing had ever been brought up about that name. We have certainly never said it in our home… where had this come from? WHO had this come from?
After that we prayed over Declan’s room. Over him, over our house. We prayed and declared that JESUS was the Lord of our home. That HE was on the throne, and that in JESUS’ name the devil and his demons would FLEE from our house. I put up homemade construction paper signs in Declan’s room stating, “Not Today, Satan” and “Jesus is the Lord of our home”.
I immediately felt a sense of peace.
You guys I was angry. Angry that the devil was trying to mess with my baby. Angry that he was going after someone so vulnerable instead of me. Angry that he was stealing my joy.
What was the reason for this? Was it because of my speaking? Was it because I was going out there and proclaiming Jesus’ name and his healing power? Was it because of my awesome marriage and having a servant-hearted leader for a husband which in turn represents a beautiful picture of Christ and his church? I felt like it was my fault. And not at all to make it sound like I’m this super spiritual, better than you, going out and doing Jesus work person. BUT, this is what I know. I know the devil comes to steal, kill, and destroy. I know that he doesn’t want God’s name proclaimed or his miracles uncovered. He doesn’t want God’s healing power, his goodness, His GRACE put in the lime light. Satan doesn’t want God’s name lifted high. And because of this, He. Was. Attacking.
I spoke this past Saturday to 200 women about our story and how God wants to use each and every one of us and our stories for His glory. So many people were praying for me – for my nerves, for confidence, for my health, specifically for my voice so that I would be able to share. I appreciated it so much. God’s name was glorified and lifted high that day.
BUT, on the morning I was going to speak, guess who came down with a fever and a raspy voice that was so hoarse you could barely hear him. That’s right, my sweet baby, Declan.
You guys, the Devil is raging WAR. I just feel like he is trying so hard right now to tear my family, my boys down, (Specifically Declan). Some days, I can’t help but think… is this worth it? Me sharing my story…the devil attacking… Am I putting my family in harms way? If he was attacking me, I’d say BRING.IT.ON. but when it’s my sweet, innocent, can’t fight for himself son, this mama bear can’t help but wonder if the white flag needs to be hung. I’m just being super honest here. In my heart I know that I will keep sharing, keep showing up. But it’s so hard thinking that maybe the good God is having me do is hurting someone I love so, so much.
Nate and I are no strangers to infertility. We experienced it for years before Declan. Praise God after 3 intrauterine inseminations, we conceived. With Hudson, after more infertility, God breathed life after 2 inseminations. And now… God has put the desire in our hearts for another and yet 5 failed intrauterine inseminations and a blocked fallopian tube loom in the air with still no success. We praise God for these two beautiful sons that we have – don’t get me wrong we are so, so thankful – but this struggle, this trusting God with another child thing, just doesn’t get any easier no matter how many times you go through it.
Not being able to have another baby after doing the exact same procedure as with the other two… coincidence? I think not. Satan doing what he can to steal, kill, and destroy? I think so.
So people, this is my battle cry.
This is my plea.
We NEED to be praying for protection from the evil one on behalf of our kids. They’re an easy target. Weak, vulnerable, gullible, and oh so innocent.
THEY ARE OFF-LIMITS SATAN.
We NEED to be praying over our homes. Our marriages. Satan despises happy couples glorifying God together – families glorifying God together.
BE GONE SATAN.
We NEED to be praying over our places of work, our adoption processes, our missions trips, our speaking engagements. Because you know what? Satan sees that you and I are doing something GOOD. Glorifying our God. Sending hope and help to the hopeless. Healing for the broken. Hope for the dis-heartened. He sees and he knows you’re doing a good work and he.doesn’t.like.it. and he is going to try and do everything in his power to stop it.
We need to surround ourselves with an ARMY of prayer warriors. Lifting each other up, standing up against the enemy, and if necessary, carrying each other when one of us feels like flying the white flag. Here’s the thing, if we’re doing something for God’s glory, attack will come.
Be vulnerable. Open up with people about what’s going on in your lives, what you need prayer for. Don’t let the devil take a foothold in an area of struggle in your life.
Yes, struggling through this season is hard right now. But through those seasons God changes us. God grows us. God still shows up and says, “I am here! I am with you! I will never leave you or forsake you! I.already.won. Trust me.”
So Satan, this ones for you.
You will not win. JESUS is the Lord over my home. You can discourage me with our fertility struggles, you can make me feel helpless when going after my sweet boy. You can even steal my joy. But you know what?
You’ve.already.been.defeated.
So no more.
God is on the throne in my life, in my home, and in my heart. God, please fight this battle for me.
1 John 4:4 — “You are from God, little children, and have overcome them; because greater is He who is in you than he who is in the world.”
Deuteronomy 3:22 — “Do not fear them, for the Lord your God is the one fighting for you.”
James 4:7 — “Submit yourselves to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.”
Luke 10:19 — “Behold, I have given you authority to tread on serpents and scorpions, and over all the power of the enemy, and nothing shall hurt you.”